Deep Sadness
We had to put down Terra today. She had a fast growing cancer. Originally we had thought that she was having issues with her hips as she had bad hips as she stopped walking for the most part the last couple of days and stopped eating. Goldens never stop eating. Havanese do. A golden is a food hound to the max. She refused steak.
When we arrived at the vet she walked in the door and hadn't been. I had great hope they would put her on Metacam and then that was it. She walked - of course she was fine. But her gums were ashen, her breathing labored. I attributed the breathing to the walk but even after an hour it was labored as she stayed on the floor. Her heart rate was racing. She was very ill and testing revealed she was bleeding out fast. This was a fast spreading cancer as it began to effect her lungs as well. Denial is a wonderful thing I suppose at times but this was so fast - well I am shocked.
Removing the spleen was no longer an option and this happened in days. Removing the spleen can buy you up to 6 months. It is a silent killer in dogs like goldens.
It's a crime as she was an amazing dog - yes with bad hips but she never complained. She loved the pups. Was a gentle soul and never demanded anything but a little love. She played with the Spice pups just last week. She was always a great big dog socializer.
I love all my dogs more than you can ever know. I stayed with her to the end. Nathan cried in the car. We both cried all the way home. We each grieve differently. Poor Dennis is deeply sad. But I will tell you my heart feels like it is broken beyond repair.
Yes, good that it was quick but you are in shock. No time to think. No time to say goodbye truly. I am glad that we do so much with our dogs every single day even when I am sick. I have many memories but for now I am in shock and deeply, deeply sad.
We came home, took out the pups into the grass and clicked and played.
So forgive me if I share a few photos of Terra over the years. It's the ones I could find without searching.
Terra and Shoshi. She played flicking snow games with her and was famous for always getting down to the puppies level to engage them in play.
Panda adored the Terra - well visitors and our own all did. She was a dawg magnet.
She is greatly missed.
Reader Comments (26)
Words cannot express how we feel for you, Nathan and Dennis. It is beyond sadness. We often say life is short, even more so for our canine family members. They are truly part of our every day life and family and such a loss is huge. We are sending you all our love and hugs. Anne, Russell and the Coops
Yes - thank you.... Terra was a special one indeed. Went out and swam in the rain and cried my heart out. Feeling so unproductive but we also have had good news - a new grand daughter and Tangles owned by Paula, Nathan and I won best puppy at the national specialty and Select. This is huge. We also got more bad news. Our uncle who just lost his wife (our aunt a couple ago) is very ill and they give in 24-48 hours. What a day this has been. Such highs and deep lows. More than the heart can handle at times.
Not that this helps, but I can tell you that I have been crying over the loss of Terra. I cannot begin to imagine what it's like to loose such a wonderful companion, friend and family member. On the positive side, I am so happy for the good news about Tangles and the new grand child. Sorry to hear about your uncle. Stay strong, same goes for Nathan. As for us, we are doing our "three way hug" and thinking of all of you.
D&N - I feel your pain from your eloquent words and I cry w/ you. I realize there is nothing to say to help you feel better as it's your journey w/ your lovely Terra. She sounds like a wonderful companion. We're grateful Laci experienced her early days w/ her.
One thing I can share is that it's never easy no matter how they go. End result is it's the loss of their companionship that no other can replace.
Thank you for sharing this time w/ us and the beautiful photos of your beloved Terra.
A special candle is lit at our home in Terra's honour.
We're so very sorry for your loss, Darlah and Nathan.
She was such a great dog. I can remember back to my very first visit in 2008, Terra latched on to me and followed me all over the place because she loved the head scratches I was giving her. One of my favorite photos that I've ever taken is one of My with Terra.
We're really sad to hear the news and send our best wishes to your family and crew.
Darlah and Nathan,I am very sorry and saddened with your loss of terra.they truly are part of our family,asking for nothing and giving so much love .also very sad family news.so much to handle ad absorb.thinking of you.ps. I brought Stella home 2 years ago today.i hope you can find some peace and joy knowing what you bring to so many people.stella is laying on my legs as I type.
I have no words, just tears. Know that I am thinking of you all and pray for peace i your heart. You were the best parents a dog could ever have and I know Terra loved you all just as much as you loved her. Take Care and if there is anything I can do for you, let me know.
We too are shocked how quickly this happened. We so absolutely feel and understand your heartbreaking pain. Can't help but cry for all of you and Terra who was such a special girl with her love of the pups. So sorry about your sad news regarding your Uncle too. Sending all our love and many hugs from Dick and I.
Great news about the Tangles and the new granddaughter although I'm sure it's difficult to feel joy about anything right now. Please take care. You are so very dear to us as is Nathan.
I am so very sorry for your loss! I know too well how hard it is to lose a dog who becomes a member of your family! My thoughts, tears and prayers are with you guys at this very trying time.
Darla and Nathan, I am so sorry to hear of your sad news. It is never easy nor can anyone replace that special place she has in your heart. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
I am so very sorry for your loss and share your pain. I went through a similar loss last fall and understand the total shock and disbelief that you are experiencing. Dogs do such a good job of hiding their suffering it sometimes means that by the time we realize they are ill, it is too late to do anything about it. There is no easy way to deal with the grief but know that others are thinking of you !
I am so sorry to hear such sad news. Terra was a beautiful dog, heart and soul. I'm honoured to have had the chance to meet her, and glad that Tre also had the chance to receive his big dog socialization with her. She will be missed by all your family, human and canine. We send our love.
I am truly sorry for your loss. I lost my 11 year old dog last Valentine's Day and had no idea how hard it could be. It was a shock as well - I still miss him terribly and know how I felt at the time. I am having trouble even now reading of your grief - it brings back so many memories of the pain. I am thinking of you all at this time.
So sorry to learn of Terra's passing. She had such a gentle soul and was wonderful with all visitors, humans and dogs. She will be truly missed. Our thoughts with you at such sad time. Sending you love and hugs.
I'm so sorry to hear about Terra's passing. My heart is heavy and my eyes are swelling with tears at this terrible news. My thoughts are with you, Nathan and Dennis at this sad time.
Tears of sadness and joy are streaming down my face. Strange how two opposites create the same response. Although I have never met you or your dogs in person,I feel like you are good friends from following your blog. I have always enjoyed pictures of Terra and all the other dogs. I am sending you warm wishes and good thoughts. Darlah, Nathan and Dennis, please hold each other tight until the grief passes and you are left with only happy memories of the ones who are gone.
Congratulations on the new grandchild and Tangle's success.
Those photos of Terra are priceless Darlah. You can see how loving and gentle she was with the pups and how they adored her. She was a truly special girl. We will miss her. Hugs to all of you during this emotional time. It doesn't prevent the sadness, but I am glad to hear there is some good news as well. Our hearts are with you.
Tears flowed while I read this blog. Hold on to each other and all the great
memories that you shared with Terra. She will be missed by all.
Darlah and Nathan: So very sorry to hear about Terra. I think losing a dog is one of the hardest things. Theirs lives are much, much too short.
Truly saddened by your loss.....
With love
Sue & Richie & Cal xxx
Oh Darlah and Natthan, I'm so sad to learn about Terra. She was truly an amazing dog. I feel your lost and your sadness. I know how difficult it is to loss a much loved pet. I know Gidget truly loved Terra also, as everytime she meet a Golden on the street, she gravitates towards it.
Audrey: Thank you! Yes, Terra really got them thinking - all goldens must be special. I hope Gidget is well, Give her a hug from us.I really miss her.
I just back from up north and I read about Terra. I'm so sorry. Pets hold a special place in our hearts. They are such a constant in your life that they leave a large void when they depart this earth. My thoughts are with you.
Barb - yeah and today our most fave uncle died. We are dealing with multiple deaths humans in the family and Terra. Not sure I can handle more but here I am.
Oh Darlah.. soo sad to hear anout your news.. Sorry about your losses. You an your family are in our prayers.
Darlah and Nathan- Please know you are all in our thoughts and prayers. Terra was such an gentle soul...waiting patiently for a hug or a few pets when ever we came by...I only ever saw her waiting her turn for a bit of love or on the floor covered in havanese! She was so sweet. I am so sad for all the losses you have had over the past months. We have been away a lot with Penny on the boat..
I am so sorry to hear about all the losses you have endured.. I cant even imagine how shocking this one was to you...even when they are older we can't believe it is the end.... .Terra had an amazing family who loved her and treasured her and did the right things for her right up until her last day....I really want to believe in doggie heaven...and she will be there!